On a lighter note, and this is a little off subject but the wonders of you tube and the people that catch their children doing "things that children do".
These are only short videos but always bring a smile to my face, even at work at 8.30 on a Monday morning, enjoy:
Monday, 30 June 2008
It seems strange how I get a letter from a solicitor asking me to stay away from my children's school, yet my ex thinks its OK to contact me via face book.
I purposely didn't have a face book or my space account for this very reason, I have already had to change my mobile number twice, change my email address, seems I should have stuck to my guns and not had an account, but then again, why the hell should I have to put my life on hold?
Alan
I purposely didn't have a face book or my space account for this very reason, I have already had to change my mobile number twice, change my email address, seems I should have stuck to my guns and not had an account, but then again, why the hell should I have to put my life on hold?
Alan
Thursday, 26 June 2008
Music brings back feelings
Strange how a piece of music can bring back so many feelings, I was on youtube yesterday and came across, Armageddon soundtrack, aerosmith don't wanna miss thing: http://youtube.com/watch?v=Vo_0UXRY_rY
My youngest daughter used to love this track, even tho it made her cry!!
Love Dad x
My youngest daughter used to love this track, even tho it made her cry!!
Love Dad x
Wednesday, 25 June 2008
Time goes by - I guess its over
As you can see from the dates from my blogs I have not written for a while, I can only put the feelings I have of not seeing my children like that of a bereavement of a loved one.
I know that may sound a little gruesome but in the past 7 / 8 months since I really had a proper conversation with my children, they seem to be in my thoughts less and less, that in its self is very worrying, but I guess this is how I cope.
The old saying "out of site out of mind" is not what I am saying, but like with the passing of a loved one, things do get easier with time.
I attempted to go and see my son at his school on the 10th of June 2008, I did see him, he has grown and looks different than I remember, the biggest shock for me was how he was with me, kind of cold, unsure, not frightened but not sure if he should come and say "Hello Dad", he didn't. I had to go and say hi to him, what a change from the boy that went to the concert with me back in Feb 2007.
After I went to the school I get a letter from my ex-wife solicitor stating that I should not go to the school, my children do not want to see me, hmm, strange that since there is no court order in place or any restrictions in place, I can do as I please with regards to seeing my children, I have never broken any laws nor will I.
My conclusion to any fathers facing the same issues as me is either fight it all the way, it is very, very expensive, I spent £2,500.00 just to get the 6 weeks (4 weeks access, when the ex actually showed up with the children) or 8 hours in total. Or learn to live without your children, it can be done, it is very hard but if, and I mean a big if, if you have support from family and friends you can continue with your life, never give up your prayers and always have your children in your heart and pray that one day when they are older they will want to know your side of the story and the truth, come and find you and say "I love you Dad"
Stay strong, with love
Alan
x
I know that may sound a little gruesome but in the past 7 / 8 months since I really had a proper conversation with my children, they seem to be in my thoughts less and less, that in its self is very worrying, but I guess this is how I cope.
The old saying "out of site out of mind" is not what I am saying, but like with the passing of a loved one, things do get easier with time.
I attempted to go and see my son at his school on the 10th of June 2008, I did see him, he has grown and looks different than I remember, the biggest shock for me was how he was with me, kind of cold, unsure, not frightened but not sure if he should come and say "Hello Dad", he didn't. I had to go and say hi to him, what a change from the boy that went to the concert with me back in Feb 2007.
After I went to the school I get a letter from my ex-wife solicitor stating that I should not go to the school, my children do not want to see me, hmm, strange that since there is no court order in place or any restrictions in place, I can do as I please with regards to seeing my children, I have never broken any laws nor will I.
My conclusion to any fathers facing the same issues as me is either fight it all the way, it is very, very expensive, I spent £2,500.00 just to get the 6 weeks (4 weeks access, when the ex actually showed up with the children) or 8 hours in total. Or learn to live without your children, it can be done, it is very hard but if, and I mean a big if, if you have support from family and friends you can continue with your life, never give up your prayers and always have your children in your heart and pray that one day when they are older they will want to know your side of the story and the truth, come and find you and say "I love you Dad"
Stay strong, with love
Alan
x
Thursday, 6 March 2008
First week of many....
Wow, its been just over a week now and we (me and Samantha) have not had any contact, emails, texts, voice mails or letters from my ex, and the police have not been around, I really cant beleive it!! :)
Unless you have read the text below you might not think to much of that but, this is the first time in over 13 months that we have had not contact, direct or indirect, indirect being in the form of a call or a letter to my mom.
Lets hope the peace continues.........
Unless you have read the text below you might not think to much of that but, this is the first time in over 13 months that we have had not contact, direct or indirect, indirect being in the form of a call or a letter to my mom.
Lets hope the peace continues.........
Friday, 22 February 2008
I know it has been a while since my last post but I have been doing research and finding out just how wide spread the sort of experience is, my experience, the experience of being totally alienated from your children and having to watch and listen as you see each of your children slowly turn against you, and now think that I am a total W****r, loser and a really bad father, hmm, please ask my partners 3 children who I live with if you want the truth on that.
Anyway ....
Through research and loads of support, thanks Sam, my truly fantastic and wonderful partner, only God knows what strength she has given me in the past 12 months, she has had to support me and put up with the fact that my ex has totally got it in for her, given her total abuse via phone, text, email and now even written letters through the front door, this has been going on every week for the past 13 months, every week.
What do the police and courts do.... yep, not a thing.
To be honest, after yet another 3 visits from the police this week, I kid you not, 3 times this week, I think me and Samantha have met every police officer that works and Bournville Lane police station, which is not to bad for Sam as she likes a man in uniform lol :) . (Only joking, still love you more Samantha!!) Oh not forgetting the odd prayer now and then I have come across some sites that I think will interest you, it is all to do with parental alienation, I will not try to describe it when the experts do a fer better job, if you go to Dr. L.F. Lowenstein site here:
http://www.parental-alienation.info/index.html you will find the whole shocking truth, and just how widespread this alienation is, now I have to fight on but if you want to help please just let people know about this blog or send them the link to either Dr. L.F. Lowenstein site or the following site, which I know is an American site but its a start:
http://www.parental-alienation-awareness.com
If any one, father, mother or grand parents wants to know more, just to get some support or knows of any where alienated parents can get support please post a reply.
I came across a poem off the parental alienation awareness site that really made me feel:
I have added to articles to my web site on this, again from the parental alienation awareness site, please give them a read and know that we all have feelings:
http://nlpsupport.com/articles/parental-alienation-syndrome/did-you-know-that-parental-alienation-is-a-form-of-child-abuse
and
http://nlpsupport.com/articles/parental-alienation-syndrome/a-kidnapped-mind/
Alan
Anyway ....
Through research and loads of support, thanks Sam, my truly fantastic and wonderful partner, only God knows what strength she has given me in the past 12 months, she has had to support me and put up with the fact that my ex has totally got it in for her, given her total abuse via phone, text, email and now even written letters through the front door, this has been going on every week for the past 13 months, every week.
What do the police and courts do.... yep, not a thing.
To be honest, after yet another 3 visits from the police this week, I kid you not, 3 times this week, I think me and Samantha have met every police officer that works and Bournville Lane police station, which is not to bad for Sam as she likes a man in uniform lol :) . (Only joking, still love you more Samantha!!) Oh not forgetting the odd prayer now and then I have come across some sites that I think will interest you, it is all to do with parental alienation, I will not try to describe it when the experts do a fer better job, if you go to Dr. L.F. Lowenstein site here:
http://www.parental-alienation.info/index.html you will find the whole shocking truth, and just how widespread this alienation is, now I have to fight on but if you want to help please just let people know about this blog or send them the link to either Dr. L.F. Lowenstein site or the following site, which I know is an American site but its a start:
http://www.parental-alienation-awareness.com
If any one, father, mother or grand parents wants to know more, just to get some support or knows of any where alienated parents can get support please post a reply.
I came across a poem off the parental alienation awareness site that really made me feel:
"Mommy, please, it's just not fair Daddy,
don't talk about Mommy when she's not there,
I love you both, don't make me choose,For
if I must, we all will lose,
I know that both my parents care,And in my life,
I want both there,"
Though Mommy and Daddy,
you're apart,
I love you both with all my heart."
I have added to articles to my web site on this, again from the parental alienation awareness site, please give them a read and know that we all have feelings:
http://nlpsupport.com/articles/parental-alienation-syndrome/did-you-know-that-parental-alienation-is-a-form-of-child-abuse
and
http://nlpsupport.com/articles/parental-alienation-syndrome/a-kidnapped-mind/
Alan
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