Friday 22 February 2008

I know it has been a while since my last post but I have been doing research and finding out just how wide spread the sort of experience is, my experience, the experience of being totally alienated from your children and having to watch and listen as you see each of your children slowly turn against you, and now think that I am a total W****r, loser and a really bad father, hmm, please ask my partners 3 children who I live with if you want the truth on that.

Anyway ....

Through research and loads of support, thanks Sam, my truly fantastic and wonderful partner, only God knows what strength she has given me in the past 12 months, she has had to support me and put up with the fact that my ex has totally got it in for her, given her total abuse via phone, text, email and now even written letters through the front door, this has been going on every week for the past 13 months, every week.

What do the police and courts do.... yep, not a thing.

To be honest, after yet another 3 visits from the police this week, I kid you not, 3 times this week, I think me and Samantha have met every police officer that works and Bournville Lane police station, which is not to bad for Sam as she likes a man in uniform lol :) . (Only joking, still love you more Samantha!!) Oh not forgetting the odd prayer now and then I have come across some sites that I think will interest you, it is all to do with parental alienation, I will not try to describe it when the experts do a fer better job, if you go to Dr. L.F. Lowenstein site here:

http://www.parental-alienation.info/index.html you will find the whole shocking truth, and just how widespread this alienation is, now I have to fight on but if you want to help please just let people know about this blog or send them the link to either Dr. L.F. Lowenstein site or the following site, which I know is an American site but its a start:

http://www.parental-alienation-awareness.com

If any one, father, mother or grand parents wants to know more, just to get some support or knows of any where alienated parents can get support please post a reply.

I came across a poem off the parental alienation awareness site that really made me feel:

"Mommy, please, it's just not fair Daddy,
don't talk about Mommy when she's not there,
I love you both, don't make me choose,For
if I must, we all will lose,
I know that both my parents care,And in my life,
I want both there,"
Though Mommy and Daddy,
you're apart,
I love you both with all my heart."

I have added to articles to my web site on this, again from the parental alienation awareness site, please give them a read and know that we all have feelings:

http://nlpsupport.com/articles/parental-alienation-syndrome/did-you-know-that-parental-alienation-is-a-form-of-child-abuse

and

http://nlpsupport.com/articles/parental-alienation-syndrome/a-kidnapped-mind/

Alan

3 comments:

Zoey said...

Allan,

I am so sorry that you and your family have to be going through this. You didn't mention if you had visitstion or not or if the courts have attempted to work with you.

Nonetheless, DON'T stop telling your children to think for themselves. Don't bad mouth the other parent just expose the truth to the children in a matter of fact way. You might want to join
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/ParentsAgainstParentalAlienation/

That group is a very informed group of alienated parents/one or two adults that were alienated as children/and author http://www.amyjlbaker.com/

Thank God you have your better half (lol) there to support you, that is golden! She should join http://groups.yahoo.com/group/PAS2ndWivesClub/

They are a bunch of wonderful second wives that know all about the ex's alienation tactics.

I wish you and all alienated parents the strength to make a difference!

Louise

Fathers have feelings too said...

Hi Louise,

No I no longer have visitation at all.

I did go to court and managed to get 6 weeks access after going through Cafcass etc, this was in June 07.

My ex only showed up for 4 of the 6 weeks with the children and when I did go to collect them I was either verbally abused or threatened with violence, this is when you start to notice the children changing.

The courts do not help, that and the fact I work and get no legal aid like my ex does, so I spent £2500.00 and didn't get anywhere, I used all my savings and could not afford to continue.

I have written each of the children a letter, I will find them and post them on this blog.

I will have a look at the groups you have mentioned, and yes my 'better' half has been so fantastic, a real God send.

Thank you for your comments Louise.

Alan

John Doe said...

Just a note to say hi. I haven't seen my son in more than 2 years now. You aren't alone. Hang in there man.